Up the Mountain: Part II, The Experts Who Shafted Me

Before I know it, I’m tumbling down the mountain with all the grace of someone flailing, trying to grab hold of anything. I know there are multiple witnesses to this particular stage of the journey.

Before I found Amanda, I had set up an interview with the coordinator of the Clarke County ABHS Mental Health Clinic. I gave him a quick spiel of what I’m trying to do, that I was looking for him to talk a bit about the issues confronted in rural areas when attempting to seek mental health treatment. But I had no story yet, so I gave him few details. After meeting Amanda the Monday before my meeting with him on Friday, I thought it would be only professional courtesy to give him a more fleshed out idea about what I was interested in doing. I believe in forecasting and in being honest about your intentions. Plus, if I was going to bring one of my multi-media partners interested in videotaping him, should I not give him a heads up? Not make him feel like he was being cornered into saying yes on the day we showed up?

Nope. I shouldn’t.

I fell into the hole of giving him too much information. Things I now know I should have kept to myself:

Amanda
Amanda is a client there
video camera
article

Being clear with your intentions is important. But so is not having a big mouth, I’ve decided. I’ve done a lot of thinking about this. I’m not in to manipulating people. I don’t like to beat around the bush. I like to be up front with people. As a journalist-in-training, I’m going to go ahead and be dramatic, and go so far as to say that I’ve had to redefine my values. Where’s my own moral line? How comfortable would I have been with waiting to give him more extensive details until I arrived? Is it okay to use the word story over article?

It’s still a touchy subject. But by now, I swear to you, I feel like I’m laid sprawled out on my back, at the foot of the mountain, once again. Dramatic, again? Yes, I know. But my entire story felt like it was falling part. I wasn’t expecting difficulties in finding experts. I had not prepared myself for this. If Amanda can list out her cocktail of 5 medications that keep her mood stable and tell me that when she’s not on them, she doesn’t feel like showering daily, then why can’t you, Mr. Coordinator, let me in your office and tell me about how people in rural areas struggle to find mental health services? I sent a follow up email, clarifying my intentions, in case there were any misunderstandings. I also sent a large batch of emails to various UGA professors. Thanks for nothing guys. If I sound bitter, it’s because I was at this point. No one likes to go from having it together, to feel like it’s falling part. So like I said, I’m at the bottom of the mountain, finally realizing how big the mountain actually is. You’re thinking the d-word again, I know. But he canceled on me the day of the interview and told me he thought “the best person to assist you would be the CEO.” Not even his British accent coupled with his excessive politeness helped. Polite doesn’t matter when it’s something you don’t want to hear.

Everyone knows CEOs don’t talk to you. But I pop a peppermint, because remember I have those sugar level problems, and I muster up my last bit of energy to go about harassing people via phone and email.